Thursday, May 19, 2011

Homesick

Yes, the homesickness has set in here in Annapolis. I suppose it’s due mostly in part to the fact that in four months, this still doesn’t feel like “home.” We moved so quickly and I don’t think we really had time to get sad about leaving Tennessee. I know the old adage is somewhat true, “Home is where the heart is.” But Clint and I have quickly realized that for us, Home is where family is…or at least where family and friends are in close proximity. Since marriage, we have had the conversation many times about the adventure of just picking up and moving somewhere new and different. While, I’m glad that now we can say we have done that, I’m not sure we will ever want to do it again. One could argue that a family visit for us can be accomplished in a weekend trip, and for that, I am thankful. But it simply doesn’t feel that way. With that said, we both enjoy Annapolis; love our townhouse and being close to big cities and water. What we aren’t crazy about is, of course, the high cost of living, our jobs and not being able to see family and friends whenever we want. Not to mention we miss our sweet little house that is currently for sale. On one emotional day, I even started crying when I heard a country song on the radio. Now that was an extreme and looking back on it, it’s kind of funny. But, it just goes to show how much we tend to take for granted and don’t even realize! And, if you have read my blog for any length of time you should already know we both have a love affair going on with the East TN Mountains. Let’s just say it’s going to be rough fall season for us this year being away from them. As well as college football season. I have gotten many weird looks when I said I was more into college football than pro sports. And sorry ya’ll, I just don’t understand Lacrosse.

However, I know it doesn’t really sound like it, but I am desperately trying to embrace our new surroundings. It really is beautiful, just in different ways. We still love the seafood and neat shops. And by far, this is better than other locations we have lived. So, the question we have had to ask ourselves is what do we do about it? Obviously, we aren’t going anywhere, at least not for a year or so. This is where I’m always so puzzled at how people get through rough times without God. I have faith that God lead us to this area and these jobs for a purpose. I’ve been struggling with what exactly that purpose may but, but we both have to accept the fact that we may never know. And the reason is because we cannot see the big picture of our lives. I was talking with a very dear friend the other day who posed the thought that maybe God sent us here for no other reason than to test our faith, to trust in Him. Wow, I hadn’t thought of it that way. It’s true that Clint and I have had to rely more on each other and our faith since we have been here because we don’t have family close by to lean on. Everything was going great in Kingsport and with our lives there…and maybe that’s just it. We got too complacent and started slipping away from God’s guidance because things were going so well. And then today, in my daily devotions book, I read the prayer for the day and felt a sense of His peace: “Dear heavenly Father, thank You for Your faithfulness. My heart trusts in You, and You have never failed me—nor will You. Please help me to walk by faith in joyful anticipation of the blessings that await me.”

So, while this is not a major catastrophe and may not seem significant later on in our lives, at present, it is a hurdle that we must cross. I have no doubt that we can and we will do just that. And for now, we will try to pacify our homesickness with visits from family and friends. For those of you that have always wanted to visit or revisit DC, Baltimore or the Chesapeake Bay area, we have a room ready and waiting. We may live further north now but we haven’t lost our Southern Hospitality!

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